Surrender…

Today was powerful.  The day began like a typical Monday, the lists of things to do running through my head, a little sleepy from the weekend, you know, the usual Monday things.  There has been a funky energy hanging around lately that has kept a firm grip on things, and not a very comfortable grip, mind you.  As the day went on, I began to wonder, what is happening?  Why are things like they are-why can’t there be moments of happiness and wonder everywhere-what is holding us back?  Are we spending enough time sending light, love and prayers to the people affected by the earthquake in Haiti?  Are we spending enough time supporting our families, friends, and ourselves?  Many, many questions kept popping up?  There are so many unusual things happening-from major disasters like the Haitian earthquake, friends losing their homes to fires, people that are too young to be leaving their earthly lives are leaving-time is racing forward, and it just doesn’t seem right that all of these BAD things are happening!  It was right then that the cosmic WHOP came….you know, the little hand that comes down from above and literally knocks you back into your higher vibration….so this week we are going to talk about surrender….

We all know that there is a higher light-a light that resides within us as well as in the higher power.  However, it is really easy to let the influences of the outer world grasp us and pull us down.  If we take the time to step back, breathe, and look at the larger picture, there is a lot to see.  It is hard to let the familiar ways fall away and look beyond our traditional beliefs.  But, if we can let go and let our spirit teams help, things will fall nicely and neatly into alignment.  It seems that at times like this, when we are most vulnerable, that new things are revealed if we just take the time to be quiet and let them reveal themselves to us. 

Often times we have set a boundary for ourselves, even if you are not aware of it.  That boundary can be fear, worry, or even the confines of your past holding you back.  It is time to take the brave steps required to release all of that heavy energy to the Universe and let it dissipate.  It is time to step back and hand the control of your life to your spirit team ~ they are here, you only need to be brave enough to ask for their help.  By releasing the control, you are opening a new door and behind that door is a wonderful new adventure.

Nurture yourself through these times-be as generous with yourself as you are with others.  Don’t be afraid to invest in yourself-take some moments for yourself, honor your needs.  As a friend of mine said-“you only get one self” be nice to that self!  Call upon your spirit team to help you—there is a lot out of help out there if you only ask.

So, yes, today was a powerful day.  By releasing old patterns and belief systems, it is time to move on- time to move forward and celebrate the amazing, wonderful you.  Surrender, release, let go and let God, the Universe, or whatever higher power you believe in take the questions, the chatter that races around the mind, and let it go.  Be brave and step into the new free you….

Happy Monday my dear friends…

Blessings!

Take a Single Step…

Happy Monday Everyone…

Wow, it has been a LONG time since I have made the time to sit and concentrate on doing a reading.  With the dawn of the New Year and the intention of finding my true inner self again, it has become clear that it is again time to begin the readings.  For those of you who are unfamiliar, or simply don’t remember what these readings are intended for, please remember that they are just information that has come through to me and I am guided to share with you as a general reminder to check in with yourself and see if the message resonates with you.  Some of the readings will be more ‘important’ to you than others, and that is okay—not everyone is in the same place at the same time.  The major change is that I am hoping to reach a wider audience, if you will, and I will be posting to a blog as well as facebook, instead of individual emails.  Let’s move on to what came through this week….

There is an old saying, “The journey of a thousand miles, begins with a single step”.  As we are entering a new year, one that I must say I am personally glad to see, it is time to sit with the ideas of who we are, where we are heading and what is happening to our true purposes.

I spent most of 2009 pouring myself into a business project—one that I had no ownership in, and in my usual way, I poured well over 100% of myself into.  As the year progressed on, it became very clear that I could no longer continue in that fashion.  My health declined, my relationships went backwards, and most importantly, I lost touch with my inner light.  Towards the end of the calendar year, we were forced into a time of alone-ness in my part of the world—Mother Nature let loose with one of the most ferocious blizzards the Midwest had seen in years.  I spent a good portion of those days reflecting and pondering who I had become and what I had left undone over the year.  It was during those days, that I realized (with help and guidance from a dear friend) that I was no longer heading down the path of my higher self.  It was then, and only then, that the thought of pouring all that energy into someone else’s project that it dawned on me that if I spent all that energy on myself, my family, and my own business that it might actually become something more than a dream.  But why had I never seen this before?  The answer my dear ones, is simple….nothing more than fear was holding me back.  It is time to shed the fear and self doubt and move forward-we must all be true to ourselves and not be afraid of success. 

The message that comes through for the week is to take time to look at the grander picture—if you step back and remove all emotion from a situation and look deep into it, there is a greater meaning to be seen and heard.  It is time to open your mind and let the information come through to you.  We are all in the perfect place, right now, even if it is hard to see why or where.  Take a few moments every day and be grateful for who you are and where you are in your life.  Connect with your inner self and look at the world and your surroundings with the wonderment of a child.  There is so much that is going to be happening in the upcoming days and weeks—let’s take time to slow down, reconnect with the energies that are available, and move on.  Let’s start off 2010 with a moment of serenity—get yourself out of tangle of the media, the confusion that is encroaching upon us.  Take a look at your dreams, where do you want to go in 2010?  Let’s start on a path to get where we want to go—let’s take that single step, and start down the path together, one step at a time…

Blessings…

the classified…

I should not have been driving.  Not only was the baby fighting to get comfortable, so was I.  The fear was grasping me around the throat, heart and head.  I have no idea how the two of us made it the 20 miles home through those hills.  Obviously there was a greater power driving. 

 

When I made it back to the house, I slipped in quietly through the back door, and down into my room.  I laid down on my bed and let loose.  The emotions just poured out of me, from anger to confusion, to fear, to the unknown, it was all happening, all at once, and I had no idea what to do or where to turn.  Sometime in the night, I woke up and the clarity had come to me.  I had to do what was right for the baby, for that was the only thing that mattered. 

 

I knew that there was no way that I could keep this baby.  Once my mother said something, it was pretty much a given that she wouldn’t change her mind.  I had no one to turn to, no one to help, and I was determined that I got myself into this, I had to get myself out of it.  On my way back from a trip to the bathroom, I grabbed the local paper.  As I was trying to get lost in something other than my current problem, I saw it.  The ad that would haunt me for the rest of my life.  Someone was looking to adopt a baby.  The ad said something like this….’professional woman looking to adopt healthy newborn, baby will be well provided for, only the best things, please call xxx-xxx-xxxx’.  As I sat and pondered this in the middle of the night, I thought to myself, maybe this is it, maybe this is the way to give my baby everything it needs.  It was obvious to me that I could not take care of myself, let alone a baby. 

 

The classified ad continued to be in the back of my mind for several days.  It took a lot of courage to finally call the number.  When I called, I heard the voice of a confident woman.  She talked with me for hours about how much she would love the baby, how she was a nurse so she knew how to take care of a little one, how the baby as it grew would have access to the best schools, everything that one could ever hope for their child.  As the conversation drew to a close, she thanked me for the call, and promised that if I chose her, she would love and cherish my baby.

 

After a few days, my sister was asking about what I was going to do, and I told her that I had spoken with a woman about adoption.   When I told her about the call, she seemed to think that it sounded too good to be true, so she called the number.  Little did I know that those two phone calls would shape a future that I never dreamed of…

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

something happened today…

Something happened today.  I got a phone call that triggered off a series of memories that I am compelled to share.  So, bear with me and let’s take a trip…

 

I was seventeen, alone in my bedroom and scared to death.  The stick has just turned blue.  As my heart began to race, I pondered my next move.  The thoughts were racing in my head; I had no one to turn to.  I couldn’t tell my boyfriend, he had proven himself to be unstable to say the least. I couldn’t tell my mom.  I couldn’t tell my brother or sister because they would have to tell my mom.  I couldn’t tell my friends, they would tell my ex-boyfriend.  So, I kept my mouth shut. 

 

As the days turned into weeks, I knew that I couldn’t keep a secret for long.  My mom was getting very suspicious.  I know that I should have told her, but after all it was the mid 80’s, in the middle of the heartland, and no one had a more conservative mother than I did.  I guess underneath it all, I was afraid to tell her, I didn’t know how she would take it.  I kept thinking it was almost graduation, almost time for me to move out; maybe just maybe, I could make it until then.  

 

Graduation came and went, there wasn’t much of a summer since beauty school had a term that began in early June.  By now I had moved in with my sister in my hometown, away from where my mom was.  It was easier and easier to think that no one knew, but they all did, they were waiting for me to admit it to myself. 

 

The day came, and I could no longer hide my growing and expanding self.  I had to go to the doctor and find out how far along I was.  As I sat sobbing on the end of the exam table, the doctor told me that I was now seven months along, and everything looked good.  He assured me that telling my family was not going to be the end of the world, and there were options.  Through my tears and fear, I could see nothing but the disappointment and shame I had brought to my family. 

 

I told my sister first.  She told me that I had to go and talk to mom.  I waited until evening, and I went to see her.  It was not a conversation that I really want to re-live, but in order to get this all off of my heart, I need to.  My mom was devastated.  She asked me whose baby it was and I told her, which maybe was not the thing to do at the time.  She asked if he knew and I told her no, and I had no plans of telling him, ever.  The instability in his life was something that I knew I did not want for my baby.  It was that statement that rocked the house.  My mom went ballistic.  It was at that point, she told me to “get rid of it”.  When I tried to tell her that it was too far along, that not only would the baby die, I more than likely would as well, even if I could find someone to terminate the pregnancy, she said she didn’t care.  I know now that rage, fear, and shame drove her to that point, but when she said it, it made a mark on my heart that took years to see through. 

 

After a while, she calmed down, and then she told me that there was no way I could even consider keeping this baby.  It was at that point she told me that if I even considered it, that she would take my car, kick me out of the house that I was sharing with my sister (which she owned) and stop paying for beauty school.  She offered no more than that…..except that I created this mess, and I had to be the one to figure it out. 

 

As I drove away from her house, I could feel the baby stirring in my belly.  The little feet were pressing hard against my ribs.  It was almost as if the baby wanted to escape as badly as I did…..

Sunday musings…

What a wonderful day here in the heartland….As  I was sitting by the river today, dangling my feet off of the dock, feeling the gentle breezes blow in off of the water, something occurred to me.  Things in life are just perfect.  Just that, perfect.  While that may be hard to swallow with the rising prices of fuel, groceries, and pretty much everything else, things overall are just perfect.  Mother Earth is just bringing us back to a simpler time.  Times when families joined together on the weekends to just simply enjoy each other’s company, when the sound of little childrens laughter was the sweetest, purest, only thing that you heard.  We are so busy thinking that we need to be entertained, the burning need to “do something” is the only thing that you can think of.  What happened to sitting on the porch, listening to nothing?  Just being, just stillness? 

If you can find the time to just sit, and just be, you will be amazed at what could be revealed to you.  Without the daily distractions of the phone, the satellite tv, the internet, and *gasp* the distractions of daily life, you may find the moments you need to solve the issues in your life.  Tap into your creative power, let it bloom and see what paths are revealed to you.  Think through the issues in your life, see how you would like to have them resolved, then take the quiet time to focus on the positive.  Breathe life into your dreams and see the largest picture that you can. 

Remember, we are here to learn, to fulfill our missions, and life is perfect, for we are here to sit back and learn and listen….

peace….

arianna

hello world!

Hey everyone!

welcome to my ramblings…this will be a place for me to share the thoughts and processes that run through my head…you may be surprised at what you find here, but there will always be food for thought! 

Tonight is the lunar eclipse….it is events like this that make my soul sing…the pull of the moon, the beauty of the evenings…it is all an amazing event that happens only so many times in one’s life, but yet, we seem to be so wrapped up in the day to day, we forget to pay attention to the little things in life.  Maybe we should all be so blessed as to have to slow down and savor the moments that mother nature shares with us, maybe it will become a part of us to pay attention to our surroundings again.  One can only wonder….

Hello world!

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